Calendar update and winners!

Victory Waits on Your Fingers medium_3213853041Happy Monday! I hope your December is off to a good start!

First, the winners of my weekend giveaway!

Nancy won a book from Thianna D!

Thianna won a book of her choice from Dianne Hartsock’s backlist!

Carolyn also won a book from Thianna D!

Laurie can take her pick from either the picture frame or a naughty bit of crochet.

Thanks for playing, and a special thanks to the lovely authors who donated their books.

This will be a busy month for all of us, so I hope you’ll have a chance to visit during the two blog hops I’ve joined for the month:  Dec. 3-10 is the Christmas Paws Blog Hop, and Queertown Alley’s hop runs from the 8th through the 10th.

This Thursday, the 5th, Deanna Wadsworth is letting me get a little TMI on her blog.

December 13–yep, Friday the 13th–i’ll be blogging on the ARe Cafe about biker superstitions, and on the 18th my interview with Tempeste O’Riley will post to her blog.

The week of Christmas I’ll be visiting Brita Addams on the 23rd and Cup O’Porn on the 24th. I’m not sure which bit of swaggy goodness I’ll have with me on Christmas Eve, but I never visit CoP without a present of some kind!

December 28th the lovelies over at The Novel Approach will host me again, and giving away a copy of my Christmas story. In case you haven’t had enough holiday spirit yet!

Whew, that seems like a lot–especially since I’m hoping to finish polishing my YA novel AND a full-length Gay Contemporary Romance before my next term starts on January 6th! Wish me luck!

tilted rose



Guest Author: Thianna D!

What state is your mind in?

Today i have a little show-and-tell with Thianna D. for you. She’s author of many flavors of erotica, and the wonderfully twisted mind behind Seductive Studs & Sirens—the weekly blog hop for LGBT fiction.

She’s brought a scene written just for us—hot and sexy and definitely NSFW! Thanks for all you do, Thianna!

Kink is a state of mind

In working up this post on kink, I was caught in a continual spectrum of images going through my head. I could do it on this…

or this…

or even this…

or even some of the more edgy ones… But no – I decided to do it on what – to me – is the absolutely best kink of all.

What is it?

A mindfuck.

Now, for those of you who don’t know, a mindfuck is the process of using the body’s most complex sexual organ for maximum pleasure. For those of you who wonder what that is – I am talking about the brain.

I ‘could’ have just described in basic terms what that means, but I’ve always been a fan of show and tell…so I wrote a scene to describe it instead, using the club I created for the novel Bane of My Existence. Just for you 😉 (This story is unedited, so any mistakes are mine!)

* * * *

The hour went quickly as he retrieved everything and everyone he would need to truly teach about a subject he loved more than anything. Nothing was better than a mindfuck in his opinion. A submissive’s reactions dealt so much with what was going on in their heads anyway that if one worked it right, they could make a sub cum just with one look or even a gesture. What he would teach tonight would have long reaching effects if he did it right. And if there was one thing Xavier prided himself on, it was training. He would do it right.

The mutual dislike between him and the sub he would be using was intense and he planned to use that enmity to his advantage. Bryan hated him, but at the same time he also accepted Xavier as a Master at Liasons, which meant the sub should also trust him to a certain extent. Those two things would make for interesting sport.

At midnight precisely, Xavier walked back to the bar, chuckling at the crowd that was assembled. Raising his voice, Xavier began to teach the second he entered the area. “To do a decent mindfuck, one must have adequate knowledge of one’s subject.” He didn’t even glance at Bryan who was standing off to the side as he said. “Come.” The annoyed sub took three steps forward and stood at his side, his expression trying to be carefully blank, but missing that by yards. His face gave away a mixture of fear and fury. Good. “For instance. I know that Bryan is a beastly little brat who is more likely to rip apart a dom than submit to him or her.”

As Bryan sent him a glare the current bartender, Devon, raised an eyebrow, but otherwise did not react.

“But as we do not know one another enough, I have decided to make this a lesson about knife play.”

Bryan gasped and a look of fear crossed his features before it was gone. “He will have to submit and follow my word implicitly or the chance for him to get hurt would be astronomical.” Turning toward the brat, he raised an eyebrow. “Are you ready, sub?”

Bryan’s eyes glanced over to Bane, who did not react and then to Kayle, who curtly nodded. With a small sigh of resignation, he nodded.

“Was that a sigh, pet?” Xavier snapped.

At first Bryan’s eyes went wide as he knew he shouldn’t have sighed, but then his dislike for Xavier seemed to take over. “Yes, Master Xavier. It was a sigh, sir!” A few members of the audience chuckled when he saluted him.

Without saying a word, Xavier grabbed him by the waist and lifted him onto the bar. “You will be punished for that later,” he said looking directly into Bryan’s eyes. Once again, a tiny little spark of annoyance showed before he buried it. “I am using the bar so that more can observe the knife play. Lay down.” He turned away as he spoke and continued to teach as he gathered his knife pack from his play bag. “If you are going to get involved in knife play, there are several rules you should be aware of. First. Do not do this without learning from someone who knows what they are doing. And no, this lesson does not count. If you choose to do this, get a mentor who knows knife play and learn from them. Second. Always use the sharpest of knives that can be sterilized. The knives I use are made from surgical stainless steel.”

He opened up his case above Bryan’s chest and showed everyone, including the nervous sub, the eight blades inside. “There are a few dangers inherent to knife play. These knives are in fact, brand new, but one of the dangers of knife play is the spread of disease. That is one of the reasons knife play is considered edge play. When I play, I clean the knives off with alcohol immediately and put them in a safe container, but once I get home, I have a machine that will sterilize them to hospital grade. At that point, I don’t touch the knives, but use another sterilized instrument to remove them and put them back in here.

“Another danger,” he continued as he placed the knife pack by Bryan’s head, “is through the loss of blood. You can, even accidentally, cut someone too deeply or accidentally cut a vein or artery. Not to mention when you insert one of these into a sub’s ass, if you cut him and if he is not expecting it, he is gonna be pissed.”

Several doms chuckled.

“Arms up,” he commanded and after taking a deep breath to steady himself, Bryan raised his hands above his head. Xavier hooked his wrist restraints to chains attached to the bar. “Legs too.” Bryan lifted his legs in the air as if in pure defiance and Xavier barely contained his own sigh. Damn if the boy wasn’t a brat. Grabbing two larger restraints, he hooked them around Bryan’s upper thighs. “Legs up, feet down.” Slowly Bryan lowered his feet and Xavier hooked ankle restraints to thigh restraints and then reached for one of the chains that were attached to the floor, hooking his left leg to it. Moving round to the inside of the bar, he did the same with Brian’s right leg so his legs were restrained tight and out to each side, leaving his cock and ass completely displayed.

“On a less knowledgeable sub, I would do this on a table so I could completely immobilize his body, but as Bryan has been a sub for years, I am sure he can remain completely still.” Bryan sent him another glare, which made him pause. “You will be punished for that later, as well,” he said sharply, picking up the packet of knives and purposefully placing it between Bryan’s legs where he could not see it. Instantly, the sub lifted his head, trying to keep an eye on it, but Xavier pushed it back down to the bar.

Almost as if he could not stop himself, Bryan’s head lifted again. Amused despite himself, Xavier glanced over at Devon who was watching the play with interest. “Care to help?”

With a grin, Devon said, “Drinks can wait until after the demo.” Without another word, he walked over to them and placed his hand on Bryan’s head, pushing it down to the bar. As he kept it there, Bryan could not do a thing.

“Good, now that we have the brat somewhat restrained,” Xavier said dryly, inwardly smirking when a hiss came from the man’s lips, “we can get started. Knife play can be done anywhere. The face, neck, shoulders… essentially anywhere on the body which makes it a very useful tool. As this is Bryan’s first time with the sting of a knife, I will use the four-inch blade. Don’t forget – get a mentor who has been doing this for a while, someone who really knows what they are doing. Just as you should never swing a flogger unless you have been taught correctly, you should never engage in knife play without being suitably prepared.”

He held up the four-inch blade so that everyone could see it – especially Bryan. The sub’s breathing picked up and Xavier paused. “Where are you at?” he inquired quickly. If the sub was already at red, he would stop right away, the demo be damned.

Bryan took a couple deep breaths and stared at him with an expression that clearly said ‘you can’t best me.’ “Green, Sir!”

“Good,” he said, placing the blade an inch above Bryan’s right nipple and lightly trailing it along. “It’s best not to start on the sub’s most sensitive area. Instead, just like with any play, you want to build up their knowledge of it.” As he continued to teach, he trailed the knife over and around each areola, even sliding the edge over his nipples. Bryan’s breathing increased, but to Xavier’s amusement, each breath had changed to that of excitement rather than fear. “As you can tell, the endorphins are now rising in his body and any pain he feels will also bring pleasure as long as you do it right.” Trailing the blade down the man’s stomach, he slowly drew it over Bryan’s hips and lower, dipping it between his open thighs  before trailing the dull side along his cock.

Whimpers burst from Bryan’s throat as he began to pant with the exertion of holding back an orgasm. Placing the knife down, Xavier instantly picked up a piece of pre-lubricated metal the same circumference as the knife and pushed it slowly into Bryan’s ass even as he tapped at the tip of Bryan’s cock with the edge of the knife. A yell erupted form the man’s lips as his body spasmed and shook. Slowly, Xavier placed the knife back down and waited for Bryan to calm before pulling the piece of metal out of his ass and holding it up, showing it was, in fact, not a knife at all. Devon released his head and as Bryan began to tremble with the after effects, still managing to shoot a half-assed glare in his direction, Xavier wrapped things up. The little brat had reached subspace which surprised him. He thought Bryan would be too terrified to do so. “Now,” he said in amusement, “we can return to the original subject of tonight’s lesson. For it wasn’t really about knife play, though that was included. This was entirely about a mindfuck. Bryan thought I inserted a knife into his ass and as it is one of his biggest fears, I played off that. A mindfuck,” he explained as he placed the items he used into a plastic container with some rubbing alcohol, “can be an incredibly enjoyable experience. If you have any questions, please come seem me later, or even tomorrow. For now, I have a sub to take care of.” Without another word, he and Devon released the man from his restraints and he lifted him from the bar, carrying him over to a quiet corner to take care of him.

* * * *

Thianna D is an author of both het and gay erotica and erotic romance, most with BDSM or spanking themes. The sequel to her best-selling gay spanking romance As Natural As Breathing, titled Took My Breath Away, will be released on December 18th from LazyDay Publishing.

Current links where you can find me meandering about:

Smashwords author page:

Amazon author page:

My blog:




Guest Author: Deanna Wadsworth

Countdown to Christmas with Jorge

28 days and counting

 Hi, my name is Jorge. I am one of Santa’s elves and you may remember me from my cameo in PIP’S BOXING DAY WISH, Book Two of THE NAUGHTY NORTH POLE series by Deanna Wadsworth. I run the social media division at the Mail Department in the North Pole workshop. People are always curious about what happens at the North Pole so I invited a few elves to help me with a Countdown to Christmas blog tour. Some of the elves you may know, and some you may not. I even got the big guy Santa and his sister Lady Claus to join in.

Thanks so much for letting me kick off this tour, Charley!

It is 29 days until Christmas and I cannot tell you how crazy busy we are here up North Pole. I’m working so many are hours I hardly have any time to get laid. And if you know anything about Nordic elves, that is a recipe for some candy-coated backup! But little can be done about that except a few jerk off sessions whenever you get a break—which isn’t often at Christmastime. My inbox has been exploding with e-mails from little kids and all the things that they want for Christmas. I make sure the messages get to the right toy departments to help the toy production to be more efficient, not because Santa actually has to read the letters. He can read minds and hear wishes without even trying. I always get nervous around him because he could read my mind if he wanted to. The last time I talked to him I was so worried he would learn about me and the guy from the Electronics Department getting it on in my office. Oh by the gods was he amazing! And his cum tasted like a jelly donut! Talk about an interesting flavor! But I really shouldn’t have let him fuck me during work hours because I could hardly sit at my desk the rest of the day….. but let’s just keep that between us and not tell Santa, okay?

So anyways, lots of hustle and bustle going on up here and there’s even a new installment of THE NAUGHTY NORTH POLE coming out this Friday, written by the lovely Deanna Wadsworth. I really like her, but too bad I don’t do chicks. Maybe I should consider it, though, if it will get me my own book.

My best buddy Lars is the star of Book Four—FUN & GAMES WITH RUDOLPH. I’m not really sure what is in it besides cyber-sex and spanking, because both Deanna and Lars are being hush-hush about all of it. Kinda makes me wonder if Lars is seeing somebody on the sly. That would be a shocker. You see, Lars doesn’t do repeats. In other words he never has sex with a guy more than once. At least not more than one night in a row LOL But like I said, he’s being real secretive. I actually heard him the other day turn down a blowie from a guy over lunch! I’ve never heard him do that! Ever.

So believe me, I can’t wait to hear what happens to Lars, because he’s been a real crabby son of a bitch recently. That guy needs nothing more than a to be bent over and drilled. I always say, nothing sets the world right like a good dick up the ass.

Well, I got to get back to work. My inbox has not stopped pinging since I’ve been writing this blog.

Thanks again for hosting me, Charley! The next stop on the blog tour is this Friday so make sure you stop by and say hi to Ms. Claus!

Please enter my Countdown to Christmas contest to win the first three books of THE NAUGHTY NORTH POLE series and a $20 Amazon gift certificate.

Just click on the link below HERE and you will see the entry form.

It’s really easy—kinda like me on Friday night!




Naughty North Pole Book Four

By Deanna Wadsworth

Lars is the sarcastic elf who runs Santa’s Mail Department and he follows the dating rule of “no repeats”. But lately he’s been having a romantic textlationship with another elf, via the dating app Elf4Elf. When his cyber boyfriend goes AWOL after a misunderstanding, Lars realizes too late that there is more to life than sex, work, and cookies.

On Christmas Eve, Santa asks Lars to personally deliver a gift to Rudolph—a former reindeer handler who left the North Pole because of a misunderstanding. Rudolph lives on the secluded Sugar Plum Ridge and the only way to get there is by sleigh. Lars just can’t get a break!

When a sudden blizzard forces the two elves to hole up in Rudolph’s cabin, will they find a way to make their own fun and games or will one surprise ruin it all?

One thing is certain: after this night, they both will believe in the magic of the Naughty North Pole!


“What were you thinking?” my rescuer growled as he put his sword away. “These damn sleigh bells are like painting a big target on your back that says ‘come eat me.’”

His crusty demeanor and bad temper irked me. “Well, how in the name of Christmas was I supposed to know that I would get attacked by a yeti?”

“Never mind,” he said with a surly grunt. “Get over here.”

Tamping down my frustrated tears—I’d almost been killed and this guy was scolding me like I was a wayward child—I joined him, having no idea how he intended to free the animals when they were thrashing about, tangling themselves even worse.

The warrior removed his gloves. To my shock, his hands appeared normal, no claws or magic sparks or anything. Without fear of the beasts or their projectile antlers, he placed one hand on each reindeer, whispering words I didn’t understand. The soothing melody of them made me think he might be speaking the ancient language of the Elven races, but I had no idea what he said.

Instantly, the beasts calmed.

I stared in shock, my adrenaline still pumping. “How did you—?”

Eyes that had first appeared to be glowing stared out from above the balaclava covering his face. Snowflakes sparkled atop heavy lashes and the slight red in his brown irises indicated he was not a god, but rather a Dökkálfar.

“No time for explanation, my young elf,” he said. “We have to get them free.”

Nodding obediently, I agreed to help.

I assisted the best I could, holding the things he told me to hold while he did all the work. Lula was the first one loose and the second she realized it, she bolted and ran up the ridge.

“Wait!” I called after her.

“She’ll be fine,” the other elf told me. “Lula knows the way to my barn. Help me with Betty. She looks hurt.”

“Lula poked her with an antler.”

“Doesn’t surprise me with that one. Lula’s a real pistol.” I could hear the smile in his voice and, when it wasn’t yelling at me, it was a very pleasant, youthful sound, one that soothed me as much as it had the beasts. Though a dead yeti lay mere feet from me, I suddenly felt safe and protected beside this elf.

“Well, Betty,” he said to the reindeer. “Let’s see if ol’ Lula got you for real this time, or if you’re fit enough to walk.”

Thankfully, once he released the harnesses, she was able to stand. After he ran his big hands over her withers and legs, he buried his face against hers, whispering more of those ancient words. She huffed a few frosty breaths and tossed her head, as if nodding.

“What’s your name, elf?” he asked me.


“Well, Lars, what say you and I let Betty carry us out of this place before any more yetis show up?”

“Sure,” I said, letting out a whoosh of breath. Curious, I stared at the big, fur-covered elf but already had my suspicions about the answer. “Who are you?”

“Name’s Rudolph.”

Deanna Wadsworth might be a bestselling erotica author, but she leads a pretty vanilla life in Ohio with her wonderful husband and a couple adorable cocker spaniels. She has been spinning tales and penning stories since childhood, and her first erotic novella was published in 2010. When she isn’t writing books or brainstorming with friends, you can find her making people gorgeous in a beauty salon. She loves music and dancing, and can often be seen hanging out on the sandbar in the muddy Maumee River or chilling with her hubby and a cocktail in their basement bar. In between all that fun, Deanna cherishes the quiet times when she can let her wildly active imagination have the full run of her mind. Her fascination with people and the interworkings of their relationships have always inspired her to write romance with spice and love without boundaries.

Check out Deanna on the web! Facebook  Twitter Blog  goodreads

You can buy Deanna’s books at Decadent Publishing and all reputable eBook sellers

Thanks so much for coming by, Deanna and Jorge! I hope all your holiday wishes come true! 😉

Guest Author: Grace R. Duncan!

Today I have a special treat to share from Grace R. Duncan. She’s taking us inside the mind and heart of a Dom, including a peek into her new release Deception.

Thanks for visiting, Grace!

“Kink” is a very broad word. It’s often automatically associated with BDSM (or Bondage & Discipline, Domination & Submission, Sadism & Masochism), but really, kink involves anything that is non-vanilla sex. However, it is BDSM that I would like to discuss today as my kink month post. I have been involved myself, with many different aspects of BDSM. I love it, love most of the things involved with it (though there are plenty of kinks I won’t touch with a ten-foot pole). But one of the things I get into most is the Domination & submission part of it.

Last week, I talked on Shira Anthony’s blog, about the submissive mindset in a D/s relationship. I am submissive and it is an easy thing for me to understand. However, turning that around to understand the Dominant mindset is quite a bit more challenging. It’s almost like a different language.

But for Deception and, to a lesser extent, Choices, I needed to be able to understand that. In Choices, Bathasar was brand new to dealing with and controlling a pleasure slave. As he was learning, so was I, so it was a bit easier. However, Cyrus, a pleasure slave for years, had been exposed to it much longer and I needed to be able to understand that much better if I was going to write about it accurately.

The problem that comes with this, like any other aspect of BDSM is that being a Dominant (like being a submissive) is extremely individualized. What one Dom might tell me a different Dom might immediately contradict. For every Dominant out there, there is a different way of doing things. I wouldn’t be able to capture and write about a “standard” Dom since there really isn’t any such thing.

Still, there was one I was very close to that I could ask: my own Sir. So I sat him down and picked his brain about his side of the D/s relationship. One thing both sides agree on: there is no right way to “do” D/s. As such, there’s no “right” way to Dom.

And while there is no “right” way—because everyone has a different way—there is a wrong way. Avoiding safety, ignoring the single most important part of BDSM, which is the SSC credo: safe, sane and consensual. Some argue that SSC isn’t necessary in fiction. I disagree and I’ll leave it at that, as it’s beyond the scope of my post here. (Seriously, I could go on longer than Choices about all the aspects and facets of a BDSM relationship and kink play.)

Anyway, the first question I had to ask my Sir was, “why do you like to Dom?” Honestly, I already knew part of it, because this is the way he thinks–to do something for me that I want. That’s the easy part. But being a Dominant involves a lot more than that and I needed to dig deeper if I was going to write one. (I am also well aware that, for some people, it’s not a “like” issue. Some people just are dominant or submissive and would never be comfortable switching, which is fine. My Sir and I are like that.)

So, what did he say? Something that had already been brewing in my mind for Cyrus, anyway: to have something he can control.

In our normal, modern-day world, there are often things that happen beyond our control. When this happens, when they get crazy, a Scene can help my Sir feel like he’s actively controlling something. He plans, organizes and sets up the Scene and every aspect of it is up to him.

Cyrus, likewise, has very little in his life that he can control. He is a slave. In the end, what he does and with whom is not up to him. His body is not even his to control. And it drives him nuts. On top of that, his first sexual experiences, while consensual, were far from pleasant and those are always in the back of his mind.

One way he can find a bit of control in his otherwise out-of-control world, is to dominate whenever he can. Until Deception, that didn’t happen often. Usually, when he and Nadir were requested together, he could guide Nadir in the ways he wanted, but that was about it.

However, in Deception, he finds himself being given much more responsibility in dominating not only Nadir, but also, now, Teman.

Now, he is faced with doing much more than guiding and controlling the sex between himself and his lover, but taking care of Nadir’s and Teman’s submissive mindsets, dominating them completely and then even planning a full scene!

Needless to say, Cyrus… well, he was quite conflicted to find himself in a fully dominant position. It grows over the course of the book, but being the one both responsible for and in control of a full Scene is a lot more than anything he’d done before with them. And it simultaneously thrills him and makes him incredibly nervous.

But as he started thinking it through, he realized that, having helped their slave master, Salehi, train other slaves, he did have experience. He really did know what to do. He just needed to plan carefully and as he does, he realizes he can handle it.

Even knowing this, when the time comes to actually do it, he is, once more nervous.

CYRUS paced the length of the bathing room, trying to calm his nerves. He barely noticed the deep-blue silk tunic, pants, and slippers he was wearing. He’d finally started to get used to wearing clothes again, so it wasn’t nearly as uncomfortable as it once was. Instead of being miserable, he was just slightly uncomfortable, and he knew it would get better the more he wore them. The clothes were important; he needed to help establish his dominant position over both Teman and Nadir, and being dressed when they were naked was part of that.

His cock was out of its cage and hard, and that caused him more problems, much more than the clothes. But he’d requested this, not wanting to have to fight with the cage when the time came.

The biggest problem he was having was his nerves. He’d been trying to calm himself and get over his nervousness for more than a week, since before he’d been to see Salehi. But every time he’d calmed down, every time he thought he had it, his nerves would unreasonably kick in, and he’d worry he wouldn’t do it right, wouldn’t handle them right, or something.

And now it was here.

Teman and Nadir were in the main room, slowly edging themselves. They wore thick gold cock rings, thinner glans rings, and the jeweled plugs Cyrus liked. They’d been denied since his visit to Salehi, and both were more than ready for release. Nadir had nearly been glued to Cyrus for the last couple of days as his denial hit the point of desperation. Bathasar sat on a chair in front of them, watching them, waiting for the evening to begin.

And Cyrus needed to get over his nerves and just do it.

He could handle this. He knew it. But when he’d been doing it for Nadir, just the two of them alone, it had been different. Then, he knew what to do because he knew Nadir. He knew Teman too; that wasn’t a problem.

But now he wasn’t just doing something for them, he was also trying to show Bathasar there was a good and positive way to give pain. He knew there was an element of convincing he had to do with this. And any pain play Teman might want in the future was dependent on this evening.

While Cyrus has more riding on the success of this particular Scene than the care of his submissives, he is still very aware that the main thing he must care for is them. He understands that to give to them, he must give them the chance to please him. But ultimately, what he cares most about is making sure that they are cared for.

So, in the end, while he loves that he can finally control a small portion of his life, he’s well aware of how precious that bit is and how much he must balance to do it right. But he loves it and the challenge to reach that balance is a big part of what makes that dominance so attractive to him.  Being able to keep that balance gives him the confidence to do and go after the things he needs when faced with the big choices.

Follow the giveaway here:
For more from Grace, check out her website here:

or on Facebook:
To check out the entire Golden Collar series, head over to the Dreamspinner Press page here:

Be sure to check the Facebook page and visit my other blog stops in celebration of Deception’s release for more chances to win!

* * *

Cyrus and Nadir first met as hungry orphans on Behekam’s streets at twelve years old. They became friends, then partners in the thievery that enabled them to survive, and as they passed their days together, they fell in love. When they are both taken as pleasure slaves in the opulent palace of the Malik of Neyem, love becomes more complicated.

Rumors of an attempt on Malik Bathasar’s life put Cyrus and Nadir’s relationship to the test—they must pose convincingly as intimate slaves to the young malik as part of a plan to lure the assassin into the open. Teman—Malik Bathasar’s real personal pleasure slave and true lover—was once trained by Cyrus for the same duties, and the attraction and care Cyrus developed for him then still remains. The Malik of Neyem proves an easy man to love and Nadir’s feelings for him grow while they’re pretending to love each other.

Cyrus and Nadir care deeply for each other but they’ve forgotten the first rule of love: communicate in honesty. Their love remains strong enough to weather the changes—if they have the courage not only to face the coming dangers, but to put aside deception and find their truth.

Guest Author: Posy Roberts!

If you visited during my Bi Pride Week celebration you probably remember Posy Roberts. Her post was personal and colorful and altogether wonderful, and this one is no different! Thanks for coming back, Posy!

Your kisses are much deeper than usual as you slip your hand under your lover’s shirt to thumb over a tight nipple. It’s a risk, but you palm that prominent bulge that keeps nudging you in the hip, and you want to go even further. Visions dance in your head: falling to your knees, opening his fly, releasing him from that cotton prison. You lick your lips.

Then you hear people approaching on the walking path just three feet away. Do you keep going or do you stop?

Agoraphilia – The psychosocial arousal from being outdoors, in open spaces, or from having sex in public places.

That was a new word for me, but far from a new concept. From a psychological standpoint, very little has been written on the topic, unlike its cousin voyeurism. Yet when looking at fiction, bookstores could probably devote an entire section in their stores to books with this kink in it. On the page, people are having sex in clubs, taxis, pools, showers, toilet stalls, and of course parks. And we can’t forget the back room or the bathhouse where being watched is just as exciting as watching.

It’s fun getting intimate while out and about, especially knowing you could potentially be caught. Since public sex and indecent exposure is illegal almost everywhere you go, there is an element of danger to this kink, but even if you know you won’t get arrested, the sense that you could be seen is enough to make all the risks worth it for some.

Ross in Charley’s Curious Sustenance has a little taste of sex in public, and so do Hugo and Kevin in all three of my North Star books. In Spark, Hugo skinny dips, and Kevin can’t help but follow him in the lake. Neighbors, especially at the well-populated lake, could easily spot them as they get it on. Then in Fusion, there is an even riskier experience that happens in the ocean with another person standing right beside them, again during a skinny dipping adventure of Hugo’s. What is it with these two guys and water? Maybe they have aquaphilia too, or at least Hugo might. And there will be even more in Flare.

My mind can’t help but go to high school when privacy was at a minimum. Kids were always making out at parties or even at their lockers. I still remember the little flutter of excitement I got from doing that, and PDAs were everywhere too. After privacy can be more easily found, many people leave public sex behind along with their forgotten locker combinations and high school sweethearts.

Agoraphilia is a paraphilia, or a condition where a person’s sexual arousal and gratification is dependent upon a particular act. Most people are not true agoraphiliacs at all. If a person becomes dependent on their kink to achieve satisfaction and can’t find it any other way, then they may have stepped over the line from a kink to a diagnosable problem. A kink shouldn’t rule your life but add to it.

I know some of the public sex Kevin and Hugo had sure added to their enjoyment. It made them feel (healthy) risk, which helped them bond through a shared experience. They were a good match, because Kevin was willing to indulge Hugo’s desire for public sex on occasion. That doesn’t always happen in real life. Couples often have to compromise, but if you or your partner is unwilling to try a kink for whatever reason, then pressuring them isn’t going to do anything to improve your sex life. And it may ruin your relationship.

Start small with this kink and be mindful of the laws where you live. How about giving a blow job on your deck or having sex on a sleeping bag after dark? You don’t even have to go that far. A quick grope can be just as exhilarating.

Have you heard of people having sex in public and not getting caught? How did they avoid capture? Haha. I just imagined a cop with a really big net. How common do you think this kink is?

Guest Author: Siobhan Muir!

Happy Monday!

Today my guest is the amazing Siobhan Muir. You may know her from her Cloudburst Colorado series filled with sexy witches—or maybe her weekly flash competition, Thursday Threads.

She’s grounded in the real world today and talking a bit about what makes a kink, and she’s brought a pretty tease from her December release—no witches in this one, but, hey—Navy SEALs! Try not to like it too much, because you’ll have to wait until December 2nd to read it. 😉



It’s Kink Month on Charley’s blog in celebration of her upcoming release and that got me to thinking about what is kink? We’ve all heard what mainstream media says about it and seen some of the extreme versions of it, but I think it’s a matter of personal definition. One woman’s kink is another woman’s vanilla. 😉

Like a favorite body shape or flavor of cookie, Kink comes in all shapes, sizes, and flavors, and there’s no such thing as one size fits all. It’s subjective and personal, and it’s important to remember that whenever someone tells you their kink or expresses disdain for yours. I have one friend who doesn’t find spanking a pleasant kink at all, and another friend whose go-to object to start play is a wooden spoon.

Some folks’ idea of kink is having sex with the lights on and they might have a hard limit of any position other than missionary. That’s not even vanilla to me. That’s more like sawdust, and not remotely kinky. Others need role-playing to heat things up, but their hard limit is pet play (puppy or pony) or impact play. Some folks have fetishes like perfectly pedicured feet, but reject any notion of restraints. Still others like knife play and suspension. My own hard limit has to do with pain. For me, kinky playtime should be fun with toys and costumes (lingerie and fancy shoes count), but there shouldn’t be pain. That’s my hard limit and all play stops.

The point is kink comes in a wide variety of forms and each is right for the partners participating in playtime. For some multiple partners is a form of kink. For others it’s a lifestyle.

Like Charley, I have a new release coming on December 2 2013 entitled The Navy’s Ghost and I like to call it my Ménage a’SEALs because it’s about three SEALs finding love in an unconventional (kinky) way. Lieutenant “Retro” Waters has what he thinks of as a dark need to share his woman, which his father has repeatedly drilled into him as depraved. Chief Warrant Officer “Magic” Hunter doesn’t see a problem with sharing, especially when it comes to Ensign Christiana “Ghost” Brickman. Chris wants both her swim buddies and Magic’s okay with it, but Retro fears sharing as his addiction and will do everything in his power to avoid it.  Here’s the blurb.

A SEAL is strongest with her Team…


Ensign Christana “Ghost” Brickman is the only female SEAL to survive BUD/S training, a real Navy Jane. But when an ambush ends her career as an active SEAL, she’s free to pursue other interests. Like her two best friends Lt. Jim “Retro” Waters and Chief Warrant Officer Todd “Magic” Hunter. She’s wanted them for over a year, but never dared to approach them while in the Squad.

Retro has fought his dark desires since high school, certain the need to share his women unnatural. Magic had never considered sharing before Ghost mentions it, but it solves his dilemma: his best friend or his woman.

But when Retro balks at Ghost’s offer, she marries Magic and everyone feels Retro’s loss. When Ghost and the other wives of Beta Squad are kidnapped, Retro must reevaluate how much both Ghost and Magic mean to him. And he must decide how far he’s willing to go to save the woman he loves most in the world, before she becomes the Navy’s ghost.

Sharing may not seem like a big kink, but to some folks it’s way outside the norm. And that’s okay. As Azim in Robinhood said, “Allah loves wondrous variety.” So my question for you is, do you have a hard limit on kink, and if you’re willing to share, what is it?

Thanks so much for stopping by during Kink Month.

Guest Author: Dianne Hartsock!

The Kink is in the Clothing

Ah kink. Yumm… Comes in all shapes and sizes and flavors. I do have a confession to make. I’m not a very kinky person and keep things pretty vanilla. Well, most of the time. But, oh my! I do like a man in silky lingerie. There’s something about all those sleek muscles bound in silk and a hard cock straining in lace that really gets to me.

Imagine it, a sculpted chest defined by a powder blue camisole (My favorite color. But you can have any color you want) and matching panties barely containing that hard package. Tell me you’re not interested! That you don’t want to walk up and run your fingers over the cool satin covering his chest, rub the nubs poking against the slippery fabric. You run your hands over his powerful shoulders, down his back to cup that tight rounded ass in its silky panties. You glance down through lowered lashes at his dick that has swelled so much the panties can’t contain him, the blushing crown pushing outside the elastic…

It’s been awhile since I’ve gotten to indulge this particular fetish, except in the stories I write. My genre is m/m erotic romance where I can dress and undress my men in all the silk and lace I desire. I also write a lot of flash fiction to hone my writing skills, cut down on the ‘purply prose’ I seem to throw into my stories.  Here’s one where I put a dress on one lovely man. I based the second flash I’m sharing on a picture of a man in black hose and bunny ears and nothing else.

The Dress

Tracey bit hard on his lip against a stab of jealousy. It was his own fault. He shouldn’t have shoved Ken away last night. But he couldn’t believe any man of his would want to wear a dress. Now here was Ken looking amazing in a sheer purple chami and mini that hugged his delicious ass to perfection.

He saw others staring hungrily and clenched his hands, tattoos on his arms bunching. He edged closer to the bar. Sure, he’d given up the right to say anything, but if that fucker touched Ken one more time he’d be picking up teeth.

Ken must have heard his growl and glanced over his shoulder. Pretty blue eyes widened, then a dark blush stained his cheeks and he swiveled forward. Lacey went up behind his stool and whispered, “You’re so beautiful and I’m an ass.”

“Thought you were embarrassed by me.”

“You surprised me and I’m never good with that. Forgive me?”

“I always do. Can we go home?”

“Hell no! I want everyone to see me with the most gorgeous man I’ve ever met.”

Ken stood up, smiles wreathing his face. Tracey promptly took his place and pulled Ken onto his knee.



Steve gaped as sex on two legs sauntered into the room. He pushed his chair back from the desk and rose, unable to keep the wide grin off his face. “What the fuck are you supposed to be?”

“Like it?” Gabe turned and wiggled a ridiculous puff of a tail on his delectable ass.

Unable to resist, Steve grabbed the globes of tempting flesh. Gabe pressed back into his hands and Steve leaned against Gabe’s strong body. He licked Gabe’s neck, careful of the makeup. “My father already hates you. How is this supposed to help?”

“He insists we wear costumes to that absurd party.”

“Please tell me there’s more to it than this?”

“Oh sure. Check and see if the tights are straight, love.”

Steve shifted and captured the wicked slash of Gabe’s mouth, sliding his tongue into the sultry heat. Gabe’s moan set him on fire. He slid his hands down the sculpted chest to the prize held tight in silk nylons.

They lingered, then Gabe pulled back, showing the vulnerability Steve fell in love with. “Should I change?”

Steve crushed the precious man in his arms. “Don’t you fucking dare. In fact, I’ll find something that matches.”


-As you can see, the kink for me is in the clothing a man might wear! Especially when they’re in jeans and leave me guessing at the silky surprise underneath.  *fans self*

So I’ll leave you today with the link to my Amazon Author Page where you can find all my books, and also the rest of my links in case you want to check me out.  Have a delicious day!

Amazon Author Page:






Thanks so much for coming, Dianne! Love the excerpts and the pix. And I have to admit, I’ve always loved a man in silk and lace.

Photo credit: unless otherwise noted, these lovely men are here courtesy of XDress.



Guest Author: Bru Baker!

 Today I’m welcoming Bru Baker to the party! Bru’s novel Island House is released today—November 11th!

She’s prepared a special treat for us—a prequel scene written especially for Kink Month! Later in November we’ll take over the Dreamspinner Press Twitter account together, so stay tuned for details on that. For now, I’ll leave you with the lovely Bru and her smokin’ dudes.

Thanks for having me, Charley! I’m making the virtual rounds promoting the release of my first novel, Island House. I’ve written several novellas and shorts, but this is my first full novel. I’ve been living in this state of excited nervousness about it for months, so I’m both relieved and terrified to have it finally coming out!

Island House, by Bru Baker

Unable to move on after the death of his lover, British expat Niall Ahern clings to Nolan’s dream of living in the Caribbean by moving to Tortola. Once there, he finds that not even the beauty of the island can fill the hole in his heart. Broke and spent in nearly every way imaginable, Niall wants out of the lonely, miserable, guilt-ridden life he’s carved out for himself.

When Ethan Bettencourt, a wealthy tech guru, shows up in British Virgin Islands looking to purchase a second home, he gives Niall hope that he can move on. Both men fall hard and fast, but Niall finds piloting his yacht in the midst of a hurricane is nothing compared to weathering life’s simple misunderstandings. As their troubles come between them, Niall is left to wonder if he and Ethan are over before they’ve begun.

Buy links:



The first 20 readers who buy a paperback from Dreamspinner’s site will get a signed copy!

I know it’s Kink Month around here, and honestly there isn’t any kink to be had in Island House. Niall and Ethan are just getting comfortable with each other and starting their relationship, so it was a little early to be bringing out toys and safe words.

I didn’t want to come here empty handed, though, so I’ve written a short prequel snippet. Island House picks up four years after Niall Ahern’s longtime partner Nolan Gentry’s murder, so we never get to see Niall and Nolan actually interact aside from Niall’s memories of him. Niall’s love for Nolan and his grief and guilt over his death plays a huge part in the book. Niall meets and almost instantly falls for Ethan Bettencourt, but he’s plagued by self-doubt and the niggling worry that he’s being unfaithful to Nolan even though he’s been gone for years. I thought this was a great opportunity to give readers a peek at what Niall and Nolan’s relationship had been like, since it’s so integral to understanding Niall’s inner turmoil.

This extra scene happens about seven years before Island House. Nolan is stationed in Afghanistan with the Royal Marines, while Niall is back home in the UK.

Nolan had given him the package when he’d been home on leave a month ago. They’d had fun playing with it in bed together, but when Nolan had gone back to the base to report for duty, Niall had packed it away in its discreet box and stuffed it in the bedside table drawer.

He wasn’t much for using toys on his own. Niall knew a lot of other people in his situation did—he belonged to a few virtual communities for military partners that provided a safe space to rant and rage about the forced separation, provide support for each other, and give partners an outlet to openly worry about their lovers without having to censor themselves. Most posts seemed to devolve into discussions about sex. Not that he minded; Niall had employed more than a few of the tips that he’d picked up there, like the homemade videos he and Nolan always made a point to film while Nolan was home. They’d seen both of them through more than one tour of duty. It was no substitute for having Nolan in bed with him, but it was a lot closer than the run-of-the-mill porn on the web.

Nolan had mentioned the toy being a special treat to keep both of them satisfied while he was in Afghanistan, but Niall had brushed the comment off as pillow talk. The email he’d gotten from Nolan earlier that afternoon had put paid to that, though.

Looking forward to our Skype date today, Nil. Can’t wait to see your face. Remember the treat I left for you? Wear it for me, please. I won’t be able to see it under all your clothes, but I have plans for it and you. Miss you like crazy! See you soon, babe.

Niall hesitated for a long moment before turning on his webcam and logging into Skype. He’d followed Nolan’s instructions, but he felt like an idiot sitting there with a plug inserted under all his clothes. It’s not like they’d be able to have any sort of Skype sex—not with half of Nolan’s mates from the Royal Marines there in the same room with him. Nolan’s deployments necessitated a certain amount of creativity to keep their relationship healthy, but voyeurism had never been a particular kink of either of theirs. At least, Niall hadn’t thought it was. He found himself curiously excited by the prospect, even though he knew it was unlikely that’s what they’d be doing. Nolan had to work and live with these guys, after all.

“Hey, Nil! God, it’s so good to see you.”

Niall unconsciously scooted closer to his laptop when Nolan’s image came onto the screen. Skype was wonderful, but the image was always grainy and had a tendency to freeze and flicker during their short weekly conversations. It didn’t matter to Niall. He lived for these weekly Skype dates where he could actually see Nolan and confirm that he was whole and healthy. They emailed almost every day, but there was no substitute for actually seeing Nolan’s smiling face.

“I thought your CO canceled your Skype privileges this week because of the prank you pulled on him,” Niall said, trying for severe but knowing his manic grin gave away.

“He caved. Betty went to his own CO and took full responsibility for that one,” Nolan answered. Even the distorted Skype feed couldn’t disguise his megawatt smile.

“And why would Betty do that?” Niall had never met him, but he knew Betty was an American Marine who worked with Nolan in reconnaissance.  Niall was glad they had each other, even if spending time together did usually end with one or both of them getting into trouble for goofing off or pranking their commanding officers.

“I may have implied that I had very big plans for our date. Begging was also involved,” Nolan said. “I also promised him he could have all of your next batch of cookies.”

Niall laughed. He sent Nolan care packages every month full of treats he could barter away for favors as well as Nolan’s favorite sailing magazines and candies.

“So, Nil. Are you wearing what I asked you to?” Nolan’s face came closer to the camera as he scooted his chair in, suddenly taking up most of the frame. Niall hoped it hid his own face from the room, because he instantly flushed scarlet.


“Do you have the remote?” Nolan’s expression was downright predatory, and Niall shivered in response.

“Yes.” He held it up so it was visible to the webcam.

“It’s not on now?”

“No.” There’s no way Niall could have been having a calm conversation if the plug had been vibrating. The sensations from it were intense, and when he and Nolan had experimented with it while Nolan was home, it had never taken long to send Niall over the edge.

“There are five levels, right?”

Niall’s throat was too dry to answer, so he just nodded.

“So if I held up one finger, you’d know what to do?” Nolan’s eyes were crinkling with the force of his grin, and Niall bit his lip to keep from moaning just from the sight of Nolan so focused on him.

Niall clicked the button once, his spine stiffening at the sudden onslaught of sensations. The fact that Nolan was the one controlling the speed—and that he knew Nolan was sitting out in the common room with more than one marine probably right next to him—only made it more exciting.


“Yes,” Niall bit out, his teeth clenched to hold back another groan.

Nolan’s hand came back into the frame, this time with three fingers raised. Niall pressed his tongue against his teeth but dutifully clicked the button twice more. It was becoming more difficult to sit still. The pressure of sitting up in the chair held the plug at just the right angle inside him; it was rapidly approaching being too much.

Nolan’s face came back into focus for a moment and then Skype froze. Niall felt a bead of sweat slide down his face as he held himself rigidly still. His jaw ached from the way he was clenching his teeth.. A moment later the video unfroze, and Nolan was scooted back a bit, his head turned as he spoke to someone out of frame next to him. Niall squirmed uncomfortably, his hands coming down to close over the edges of his chair so he could squeeze them and keep himself still.

“Time’s about up,” Nolan said when he finished the brief conversation he’d been having. “CO’s calling us all together. So let’s finish this, okay?” He flashed five fingers, and Niall whimpered softly as he clicked the plug up to its maximum setting. It didn’t take long—only a few seconds later he was shuddering in his seat, his lips pressed tightly together so no sound could escape. As soon as his trembling hands unclenched from the seat, Niall turned the plug off and slumped bonelessly against the backrest.

“Beautiful,” Nolan murmured, just loud enough for the camera to catch. Niall blinked his eyes open, his muscles shaking. “We are definitely doing that again.”

“Give me a month or so to recover, yeah?” His voice was rough even to his own ears, and Niall didn’t miss the way Nolan’s smile grew even larger at the sound.

“Oh, trust me. I’ll get good mileage out of that for at least a month.”

Niall laughed. He loved the idea of Nolan thinking about him as he jerked off.  “Glad to be of service.”

Nolan snorted and looked down at his lap before turning a rueful smirk toward the camera. “Unfortunately, that’s going to have to wait. Gotta run, babe. I love you.”

“Love you too, Nolan. Be safe.”

“Always, Nil.”

Niall pressed a kiss to his fingers and held them up to the screen, touching Nolan’s fingers where he was doing the same. A moment later the call ended, and Niall let his fingers slide down the screen.

God, he missed Nolan.

Now that you’ve met Niall and Nolan, I hope you’ll pick up a copy of Island House and see the continuation of Niall’s story. You can read an excerpt from the first chapter on my website,

I’ll be doing giveaways all month on Twitter, so follow me there for a chance to win some fun gifts!

Guest Author: Garrett Leigh!

Today, the wonderful Garrett Leigh is here! She’s talking about porn and the guys from Bullet, her latest release from Loose Id.

Thanks for being a part of Kink Month, Garrett!

What’s your kink?

Hmm. Now there’s a question, and of course I had to Google it.


Naked Kombat anyone? I’ll admit it right now, I clicked on a preview and found myself fascinated by a world of naked muscle men, wrestling with added fucking. I also found links for Bound Gods and Butt Machine Boys. Those sites were a little violent for my tastes. I kinda found myself titling my head to one side and thinking, ‘is he really gonna put that in there?’

But for me, that’s half the fun with porn. Getting to see things I wouldn’t do myself (can’t in many cases, as I’m a chick) and trying new things from the safety of my couch, using someone else’s body.

Further down the search page I found Wikipedia’s definition of kink, and this is what it said…

In human sexuality, kinkiness or kinky (adjective), is a term used to refer to an intelligent and playful usage of sexual concepts which are overt, accentuated, unambiguously expressive of sexuality. The term derives from the idea of a “bend” in one’s sexual behaviour, to contrast such behaviour with “straight” or “narrow” sexual mores and proclivities. The term “kink” has been claimed by some who practice sexual fetishism as a term or synonym for their practices, indicating a range of objective and objectifying sexualistic practices, which in addition to the playful can range into to the paraphilic.

Kink sexual practices go beyond what are considered conventional sexual practices as a means of heightening the intimacy between sexual partners. Some draw a distinction between “kink” and “fetishism”, defining the former as enhancing partner intimacy, and the latter as replacing it. Because of its relation to “normal” sexual boundaries, which themselves vary by time and place, the definition of what is and is not kink varies widely as well. Practitioners are sometimes considered to be perverts by “outsiders.”

Partners who engage in “kinky” behaviour typically are sexually experienced and therefore attuned to an adult level of sexuality where adult pleasures are mutually understood and developed. The idea of “kink” gets to the idea of sexual intelligence, wherein adults are educated (experienced) in sex, and are adept and playful at communicating sexual ideas to others. Such expressions may represent a mature degree of social and sexual intelligence, wherein partners and prospective partners mutually communicate sexual understanding, interests, and tastes through outward and characteristic expressions such as gesture, dress, and sexually open interaction.

See? Kink is a wide ranging word, and when I sat down to consider this post I thought about every character I’d ever written and tried to figure out their answer to the question that opens this post.

I don’t think I need to tell you how much fun I had with that. Much of what I discovered came from as yet unpublished characters, so perhaps I’ll update this post in twelve months’ time when you’ve met them all, but for now, I’m going to stick with the MC’s from my upcoming release, Bullet.

Levi Ramone and Sonny Valentine. Two very different men, who share the same profession: porn stars. Fucking men on screen for cash. Extreme websites aside, can’t get more kinky than that, right?

Wrong, as I found out when I really crawled into Levi’s psyche in Bullet. You see, Levi had somehow managed to detach himself from his profession. Yeah, he liked a good fuck and the, er, trimmings that came with it, but because he had no emotional connection to whoever he shot with he didn’t appreciate any form of kink. It was like he’d lost his sexual identity, and sense of self.

Sad, but true. For Levi, it took a chance encounter off screen, and the simple sensation of a man’s blunt nails scraping down his back to awaken a side of him he’d long forgotten. I’m a strong believer that to appreciate everything sex has to offer, you must first be at peace with yourself and what you’re doing. Kink is a wonderful thing, and we’ve all got some, but reckon real kink comes from the heart.

Enter Sonny.

Sonny turned out to be a very different animal. Totally at peace with his profession and comfortable in his own skin, he was able to develop an affinity with sex that led to some interesting, er, kinks.

He likes being watched. He liked to dominate from the bottom. He likes titillation, and most of all, he likes to share…


Levi Ramone entered the gay porn market for one reason, and one reason only–he needed the cash to pay his momma’s spiraling gambling debts.

Seven years later, he’s a veteran with a reputation as one of Blue Boy Studio’s most ruthless tops, and when his boss suggests it’s time for a change, he finds himself staring down the barrel of a gun.

Figuratively speaking, at least.

Enter Sonny Valentine, a go-go dancer at Blue Boy’s sister club, Silver. Levi has secretly admired Sonny from afar for years, but there’s one problem–he can’t stand Sonny and the feeling is entirely mutual. When Levi learns Sonny is to play the third part in a scene he considers his worst nightmare, he figures things can’t get any worse.

But when preparations for the scene from hell collide with tragic events in his personal life, he finds his fast growing, red hot attraction to Sonny the one thing left between him and a bullet.

Buy Link:


Click on the cover for a steamy book trailer!


Guest Author: Jaime Samms!

Jaime Samms is my guest today. She’s bringing us along while she ponders the ways kinks and minds change.

Thanks, Jaime, for stopping by!

Context is everything. Why I say this? I was visiting with an old group of online friends this afternoon as I wrote and we were chatting innocently about our various WIPs, sharing snippets and chuckling over characters’ witty repartee. One of them shared how a character of hers would not appreciate being called “one of [another character’s] boys”, even though he is, as I understand it, so bound to her that they live and die as one. It’s a fantasy novel. It makes sense, but the character in question, I guess, fancies himself a bit of a hard ass. Independent and all that. And as far as I can tell, it isn’t even a sexual bond. Just part of the nature of the species.

And all the time we were talking about this, I was thinking….”I can’t say that. Oh! Funny! No. Can’t say that, either. Oh, but…Damn. Nope. They wouldn’t think that was funny.” I was a good girl. I kept my commentary clean and innocent. I said nothing about how he might change his mind if the woman’s weapon of choice was a whip. Or about how he might actually enjoy the collar (he’s a wer-something-or-other) she had threatened him with in a fit of pique if he didn’t settle down and stop filling the air with the chemical stink of almost shifting. I was very, very restrained. Um. Damnit. You know what I mean.

But of course, the whole thing got me wondering. Am I really that dirty-minded? Have I been hanging with the wrong crowd so much that my mind immediately goes there with so little provocation? Or the right crowd? I try to think back to when everything wasn’t a double-entendre, and worse, a double-entendre about kink, not just sex, and it’s hard to remember when…

And it also made me realize that kink is so very relative. One man’s fetish might be another man’s snooze-fest. Vanilla to me might seem risqué and out there to my pre-BDSM, D/s writing friends. Or not. Maybe I think that just because we don’t have those discussions in that group. It’s strange to think that things I once thought were edgy now are sort of old hat and plain. What was once exciting now is comforting and feels like home instead of scary. Just shows, I guess, that everyone’s limits can move, and sometimes, without discussion or angst. Just by time and experience and life.

Like Don, in Not as Easy as it Looks, things I thought impossible once are just life now. It all happened along the way, without being noticed until I looked back where I had been and realized I wasn’t there anymore. So there you have it. It doesn’t always have to be about contracts and discussions and safe words. Sometimes, it’s just about life and love and trust, and moving through the days as yourself.

What do you think? Has anyone else noticed this phenomenon?