Yesterday I stumbled on a flash fiction challenge on FB, and it was really fun (thanks Siobhan! :)). I ended up writing 200 words that took place 20 years before my holiday story (which I won’t be able to call a WIP for much longer).
Since my release date for A Sunday Kind of Love has been pushed out to July, I’m going to give Jake & Co. a break from the spotlight and shove Ian on stage for this week’s Seductive Studs & Sirens. The poor guy’s only getting about 7K words, regardless of how many stories he tries to tell me, so he deserves a little more love.
“Ian, get in here!”
I leaned my shoulder against the wall beside the kitchen door and peeked in. Wasn’t about to pull off my boots unless it was lunchtime.
“What’s up?”
“That boy down the street—what’s his name, Mike? He’s on the phone for you.”
My gut clenched and the rag that had been spreading the grease over my hands dropped onto my boot.
“I’m busy.”
Granddad squinted at me and I showed him my hands. He pointed a finger at me so I’d stay where I was, and told Mickey he should stop by later.
“What’s that about? You mix it up with him too?”
I rolled my eyes, because that’s what the guys at school did whenever someone asked if they’d been fighting.
“No. The carburetor’s in pieces. It’s not—”
“Wake up and smell the ninety-weight, son. That bike’s a basket case. Only thing worth saving is the frame, and I’m not a hundred percent on that.”
After a short stare-down he waved me back outside. I sat down hard on the driveway on the far side of the bike. Mickey’d better not be stupid enough to come by while Granddad was still awake.
Thanks for reading!
This is a little more than 8 sentences, but as usual I’m sharing for Weekend Writing Warriors and Snippet Sunday too.
Next week I plan to return to following the rules. 🙂
Charley Descoteaux 
Sounds like Ian has something to hide from Gramps!
Ian had a lot to hide from Ian at that point! Thanks for stopping in! 🙂
I agree with Thianna. Are they going to fight or is it something else?
Definitely something else. 😉
Oh, myyyyyy. Methinks Grandpa isn’t a open and understanding kind of guy.
Well, it *was* 1993 and at 17 Ian was hiding things from everyone . . . still was at 30-something for that matter. 🙂
Hmm… intriguing snippet. What is Ian hiding? Can’t wait to find out more.
Thanks! 🙂 This is just a one-shot deal I wrote to play in Siobhan’s flash fiction sandbox, but hopefully Ian’s story will be out this December.
So, I’m guessing Ian and Mickey are “mixing it up” in a completely different way?
You got it! Although, knowing Ian it may’ve been hard to see the difference . . .
Thanks for your comment! 🙂
I like the way the dialogue snaps back and forth between the characters. Nicely done!
Thanks, Jess! This was one of those pieces where every word I typed was a surprise to me. I love it when that happens! 🙂
You’re welcome, Charley! So glad you joined us. And your 200 words were so great. I loved the emotion in them. 🙂
Thanks so much! I’m glad I took the plunge–usually just the idea of putting first draft material out in public makes me queasy. 🙂
Excellent snippet. Put sleeping pills in grandpa’s cocoa. But not too many, cause then it’s murder and an entirely different book. Ha!
*lol* Yes, that would be a different story! And if Granddad realized Ian drugged him it’d be another kind of story all together –he’s a tough old dude, I wouldn’t mess with him. 🙂
Love the dialogue with Gramps and Ian’s inner thoughts. More story, please?
Very good dialogue interaction. Very natural. Good snippet!
History Sleuth’s Writing mysteries
Intriguing. Great dialogue. Good bit.